


we loved with a love that was more than love

by kangchanhee



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Cute, Happy, Kinda, Love, Love Confessions, Love at First Sight, M/M, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-09-23 10:55:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20338966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kangchanhee/pseuds/kangchanhee
Summary: in a world in which soulmates exist, things have been made easy - you fall in love with your soulmate as soon as you see them.but youngkyun and chanhee have been friends since they were toddlers. bit hard to recognise love when it's all you've felt your entire life.





	we loved with a love that was more than love

“when do you think we’re gonna meet them?” youngkyun wondered out loud. “our soulmates, i mean,” he added. chanhee had already understood what the older meant, though. lately, they had been talking about the subject more and more often. their friends started finding their significant others while youngkyun and chanhee were still just… waiting and hoping.

“i don’t know,” chanhee sighed and shuffled in his seat slightly. youngkyun had his head in chanhee’s lap, so he didn’t want to move too much but he did need to make himself comfortable. “soon, hopefully,” he murmured and ran one of his hands through youngkyun’s hair.

chanhee didn’t actually know if his answer was true. meeting his soulmate was something he imagined a lot but at the same time, he oftentimes preferred to imagine himself living his life with youngkyun. just two best friends, feeling as free around each other as ever, having fun, without any worries. chanhee tended to get scared that if youngkyun found his soulmate before chanhee, the younger would be left alone more often. they wouldn’t hang out as often as they did now. chanhee didn’t like that thought.

“what could they be like?” youngkyun kept thinking. “i bet yours is gonna be really cool. and patient. they’d _have_ to be patient to deal with you,” the older giggled. chanhee almost couldn’t get mad at him when he giggled like that.

“i hope yours is a little bitch then,” chanhee stuck out his tongue and pouted.

“i didn’t know you wanted to be my soulmate that bad,” youngkyun laughed. insulting each other and coming up with clever comebacks was a crucial part of their friendship and by now neither of them took anything the other said seriously. neither of them ever said anything smart anyway.

“as if,” chanhee rolled his eyes. “i think we need to go to sleep,” he yawned and stretched his arms out.

“yeah, it’s late,” youngkyun sighed and slowly, almost unwillingly, got up. “goodnight, sleep well,” he smiled and then hesitated for a second longer than usual as if trying to decide upon something. “love you,” he added and headed for his bedroom.

“love you, too. sweet dreams,” chanhee replied and went to his own bedroom.

<3

the mere fact that the boys had started their night’s sleep in their own respective rooms meant nothing because now they were both curled up next to each other as they sometimes were. youngkyun had apparently had a nightmare so he came to chanhee. the boys spent about a third of the nights in a month in each other’s rooms. 

“good morning,” chanhee murmured, noticing that youngkyun was awake. he hadn’t wanted to move before youngkyun woke up - the boy hadn’t had an easy night so he had to get a normal amount of sleep at the very least.

“hey,” youngkyun smiled. “what are we doing today?”

it was a saturday so both of the boys were finally free after a long week of university and work. they usually spent the day together, either going to the cinema or out to get some food together. the boys sometimes joked that when they find their soulmates, the other is gonna be right by his side because they were always together.

“do you wanna stay in? i could get something from the bakery and we can order something. i don’t have the mental capacity of being perceived by actual people today,” chanhee chuckled. “we could play monopoly, we wanted to last week but didn’t.”

“sounds perfect,” youngkyun said softly. “can we get those cookies we had the other day?”

“definitely,” chanhee agreed. neither of them seemed quite ready to get up yet, though. the younger estimated that it was already around eleven because they had gone to sleep pretty late.

a silence landed upon the room. it wasn’t uncomfortable - the boys had known each other since they were toddlers and couldn’t even speak yet, nothing was uncomfortable for them anymore. both of them were still close together, youngkyun had an arm around chanhee and the younger was holding the other boy’s hand.

“okay, i’m gonna go take a shower,” youngkyun said after a few minutes, sounding a bit unwilling to do so.

“good luck, don’t drown,” chanhee smiled and let go of youngkyun’s hand after a few seconds of hesitation. “if you do, please try to be quiet at least.”

“i make no promises,” youngkyun shrugged and slowly left the room, shooting one last look toward chanhee. the younger rolled over onto his stomach and hid his face in the pillow. there was something he felt, a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. one he had experienced before while being with youngkyun but he didn’t understand what it was. all he knew, he _only_ felt it when he was with youngkyun and that it felt… nice.

the boy spent a little while rolling around in bed, mostly thinking about youngkyun while he did that but that was normal - all friends thought about each other. youngkyun occupied most of chanhee’s thoughts daily.

chanhee heard the bathroom door open and took that as a signal to get up and start his day too. he got out of bed and went out of his room, almost running into youngkyun who still had that smile on his face that never seemed to leave. chanhee automatically started smiling, too.

“i’ll take a shower, too, and we can order something and while it arrives, i’ll go to the bakery,” chanhee suggested. “you can wait for the order to come. i can’t let you out in public, people can get scared.”

“i’m lovely and you know it,” youngkyun crossed his arms over his chest.

“sure you are,” chanhee chuckled, shook his head and went into the bathroom. he locked the door behind him and looked in the mirror. there was a dumb smile plastered on the boy’s face that only youngkyun could put on it.

in no longer than twenty minutes, the boy was out of the bathroom. he quickly got dressed and after making sure to tell youngkyun he was leaving (read: yelling out loud that he was going away and to not wait for him back from the front door), he left for the bakery.

the boy chose all the best looking buns and cookies, smiling widely at the cashier who tended to sometimes give him a discount. he was a usual at the bakery - it was his and youngkyun’s favourite place, so they came here often both together and individually. they knew the people who worked there pretty well by now.

“how’s your soulmate doing? haven’t seen him around here in a while,” the lady asked with a polite smile on her face. they often had some small-talk whenever there weren’t any other buyers in the store, so that wasn’t a weird question to ask.

“youngkyun’s alright, he stayed home because we ordered some food but i’ll make sure to take him with me next time,” chanhee answered without thinking and chuckled. only afterwards did it click that the lady had said _’your soulmate’_. “we- we aren’t soulmates, though. we’re best friends but nothing else,” he cleared it up. the boy could feel a bit of blush on his cheeks.

“oh, really? sorry for assuming, you two just seemed so close…” the lady said, she seemed a bit disappointed by the turn of events and honestly? chanhee could get it - youngkyun and him really were very close and could seem like soulmates even if they weren’t.

“it’s okay, no worries,” chanhee quickly replied, “many people mistake us for soulmates. we’ve been friends since before we could talk, so we are close.”

“ah, well, if you say so,” she didn’t seem like she believed chanhee but the boy had witnessed a reaction like that, too, so it wasn’t something he minded anymore. well, he had never minded it, to be honest, but he minded it even less nowadays if that made sense. “have a good day, love,” she smiled and gave chanhee his goods as another person came into the bakery.

“you too!” chanhee smiled in return and left.

the boy took some coffee from the local coffee shop (without a straw and in a paper cup - save the turtles) and soon enough was in the elevator to the fifth floor where, chanhee assumed, youngkyun would be waiting for him with open arms. 

when the elevator opened, he didn’t expect to see youngkyun talking to someone he didn’t know, smiling so widely as if he had found his soulmate. chanhee felt something in his heart ache at the thought. the boy didn’t want to believe that youngkyun had found his soulmate already like that - it was a selfish thought that he wasn’t sure where it had come from and he tried to bury it but it was relentless.

“hey, chanhee,” youngkyun called out, turning his attention away from the man he was talking to. the same smile stayed on his face but something about his look changed. his eyes were turned to chanhee in a more… _loving_ way. but that was the way youngkyun always looked at chanhee, that’s just how friends were. chanhee’s worries still didn’t go away and his stomach did somersaults at the thought he had had before.

“hey,” he smiled and passed one of the coffees to youngkyun.

“this is our new neighbour - taeyang,” youngkyun introduced. “he and his soulmate are moving in next door,” he explained and it was like a weight lifted off of chanhee’s chest. youngkyun was just being friendly as he always had been. chanhee swore at himself in his mind for feeling like that. youngkyun wasn’t his soulmate, he had no right to feel like that.

“hi, i’m chanhee,” the boy attempted to wave, almost resulting in spilling his latte. youngkyun carefully took chanhee’s coffee from chanhee, seeing how the boy had been a millimetre away from making a bad first impression on their new neighbours.

“i don’t want to seem too intrusive, you don’t have to answer but are you two soulmates?” taeyang asked.

“no, we’re just friends,” chanhee and youngkyun said in unison. they had been mistaken for soulmates pretty much all their life, so they were already used to denying it so much that they had synced their answer on accident. the boys looked at each other and giggled.

“it’s an easy mistake though, so no worries,” youngkyun smiled.

“ah, sorry, you two just look at each other as if… well, nevermind then,” taeyang brushed it off. “seokwoo and i don’t know anything or anyone in the area yet, you guys seem cool - we should have dinner at our place when we set up. if you want, of course,” taeyang changed the subject.

“oh, definitely!” youngkyun took up the offer. “just tell us when.”

“will do! i think i should go now, i’ve left seokwoo to work alone for long enough,” taeyang laughed. “have a good day, we’ll see you around.”

“good luck!” chanhee wished.

“do tell if there’s anything we can do to help you guys set up,” youngkyun smiled. chanhee opened the door for their flat and closed it after the older came in.

chanhee was immediately struck by about a million thoughts at once, all about youngkyun and how they were always mistaken for soulmates. the boy followed youngkyun to the kitchen where they both sat down and the older started eating without even saying anything. probably. chanhee didn’t really listen as all his actions were on auto-pilot and he was spending his time trying to put all his thoughts in boxes and push them to a far corner of his mind.

maybe the boys really were soulmates. neither of them would know it anyway - they were both toddlers when they met for the first time, they couldn’t even speak yet. but they’d _know_ if they were soulmates, they had to. life wouldn’t throw such a big _’fuck you’_ at them.

but chanhee did feel something for youngkyun he had never felt before for anyone else. and he really doubted he’d feel that again for someone. chanhee didn’t know if it was a soulmate kind of love but it was love. love that was special and only for youngkyun. a love that he couldn’t explain. but that must be normal between best friends. everything he felt could be easily explained by chanhee just being a bit possessive for his best friend.

“hey, earth to chanhee, are your brain cells leaving?” youngkyun waved his hand in front of chanhee’s face. “what are you thinking about, if you’re still capable of that?”

“sorry, i was just…” chanhee blinked away the thoughts he had had. “did they do anything special to the cookies today? they are extra tasty, i think,” he said, ignoring youngkyun’s question.

“yeah, they’re good,” the older replied, raising an eyebrow. “is everything okay? you’ve been acting a little strange,” he had a concerned look on his face.

“everything’s good, i guess i’m just a bit tired, that’s all. no worries,” chanhee smiled as if to make his point more believable. “i’ll probably go take a nap after we eat.”

“alright,” youngkyun hummed and took a sip of his ice latte.

in about twenty minutes, the boys had finally finished eating and chanhee locked himself in his bedroom. the boy was pages deep in his ecosia search of _’how do i know if my friend is my soulmate please help me i have no idea what to do everyone mistakes us for soulmates but i don’t think it’s a mistake and i feel too many things what do i do’_. obviously, that search didn’t have any results, so he decided to instead search for _’childhood friend soulmate’_ which brought in much more results than the zero he had gotten before.

chanhee exhaled a long breath and opened the first quora story he saw. the question read _’my best friend and i have been friends since childhood and i think we might be soulmates. how can i be sure of that?’_. people in the replies to it tried to explain what soulmate love felt like.

the more chanhee read, the more nervous he grew. everything that was written there seemed so familiar. so close to the heart. chanhee felt exactly like that about youngkyun. like that and more.

though it wasn’t a subject he could so easily just start talking about out of nowhere. the boy put his computer down. but youngkyun would be the last person to judge chanhee for whatever thought the boy had had - they had made sure of that through the years. the boy didn’t have a plan. but he didn’t need a plan, youngkyun and him could just wing it as they did more than often.

chanhee knocked on youngkyun’s door. he heard the older say _’come in’_ and so chanhee did. youngkyun was sitting in his bed, computer in his lap, looking up at chanhee with an unreadable expression.

“can we talk?” chanhee asked quietly, not quite sure how to start.

“of course,” youngkyun put down his computer and sat up straight. “sit down. what’s wrong?” the older seemed worried.

“nothing’s wrong, don’t worry,” chanhee assured. “everything’s okay. i was just… thinking.”

“about?”

“okay, so…” chanhee started with an exhale. “you know how everyone mistakes us for soulmates? i was thinking that might not have been just… a mistake,” he got quieter with each word. “y’know, we’ve been friends since before we can remember and it’d make sense, so what i’m saying is that we might be, y’know…”

“soulmates…” youngkyun finished. he seemed puzzled, looking down, instead of up at chanhee. the younger could feel anxiety fill up his stomach - what if it was just stupid how he said that? it might have been far from the truth and now everything between them would be awkward. “i’ve been… thinking that, too. for a while now.”

“of course that’s just speculation, we might not- wait, what?” chanhee stopped talking in disbelief that youngkyun could have had the same thought. “you think that’s possible?”

“yeah,” the older admitted and looked up at chanhee. “i mean, it would make sense. we haven’t found anyone else yet and i think i’m not speaking for only myself when i say that i think we have some kind of a bond, so… it does make sense. i didn’t want to bring it up because i thought you’d think it was dumb but… yeah.”

“so we’re soulmates?” chanhee asked just to make sure he had understood correctly.

“i think so, yeah,” youngkyun nodded his head. and suddenly everything made so much more sense than it used to before. chanhee could imagine living his entire life with youngkyun and he didn’t even want to find anyone else. chanhee laughed at himself.

“i’m the only one who can stand you after all,” chanhee teased.

“as if!” youngkyun protested and pretty much jumped on chanhee, holding him in a tight hug. they both fell back on youngkyun’s bed, laughing. chanhee looked in youngkyun’s eyes. pretty. he lowered his gaze to the older’s lips and it seemed like they had both had the same thought.

chanhee didn’t know who leaned in first but he liked to think that it was youngkyun who just couldn’t wait to kiss him. youngkyun thought the opposite. but they both knew that it felt as right as something could feel.

**Author's Note:**

> hello hope u enjoyed!! u can find me on [twitter @witchhyuck](https://www.twitter.com/witchhyuck) and [curiouscat @markhyuckstea](curiouscat.me/markhyuckstea)!!


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